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September 09 Fat and unfit~ yea i'm becoming something like this soon~~~ if i don't do anything about myself immediatly~
i'm seriously super unfit~ my speed was worse than last week.. and i only made it to 10 rounds just now.... shit!~
i even sprained my ankle while before my jog... how fantastic can this be man~... fucking painful!~
i'm so depressed over my weight now.. and i'm serious about that....
i want my nice figure back..... haiz......i hope i can make it to 15 rounds tomorrow with a better speed!~
had breakfast at leisure park just now... quite relaxing i can say.... :)
going off to plaza sing later to collect some stuff and buy some stuff.... and i'll be back~~
going off to butter fac later tonight... with the same ppl to accomplish our misson :) dawn.... i'll try~ hehe~
have no idea on what to wear tonight bcoz all my clothes makes me look fat for the time being..... haiz~ how depressing can this be man~
fat arms, big belly, fat thighs... double chine~
haiz~~~ September 08 i'm broke~ i wanted this phone so badly... almost bought it just now.... but... i realised that... i m not rich enough... haiz... how i wish... i m rich and wealthy~
good bye my dream phone :)
met up with brand just now at plaza sing... had dinner there... and..walked ard there... nth much...
gonna jog tomorrow morning.... i need to cut down 10kg!!!!!!!!
i'm quite unhappy recently.... very unhappy.... i know what is it.. but plz don't ask me.... some things.. i wld just wana keep it down and deep inside me...
i don't wana share... it makes me wana cry.....
life sucks for me at the current stage.... everything does not seem to go right...
i need more time i guess......
more time~~
Back from langkawi~ 4 days 3 night... well.. time really flies.... just a blink and i'm already back to s'pore~
oh well.. i had fun there.. but phuket was better.... everything was cheap and fun.. as for langkawi... nth special actually... more of.. eating n the beach....
things were expensive too compared to phuket...but the rental of the car is cheap... 3 days for 210 ringgit... haha... drove almost everyday..because.. the hotel was really far from the outside world... need about half an hr walk~
but well.. bad news is.. i gained weight again... oh man~ this sucks... haiz.. i need to get back to the track again tomorrow morning....
wanted to go today but i was really too tired to do so... sent my bro off to the airport at 550am this morning... gosh~~ but well... at least he could save on the cab fare.... gonna pick him up tomorrownight as well before heading to butter fac....
recieved a really... unexpected msg on facebook inbox by someone......
i don't think he will be reading this blog but.. all i wana say is.... i felt really uneasy... i don't know what to say.... really...
how i wish i could just delete him on facebook~
i guess i'm having some allergic reaction~~ since last night.. had been scratching all over... gosh~~ terrible~
but i seriously have no idea what's the cause~ :(
oh well... tonight i'll be meeting up with brandon for dinner... finally~!! after all these months.... i guess... hald a year? i don't know.. but yea.. super long... need to catch up a little. :)
last but not least... i wld really wana thank those people who rem my bday and wished me over sms or facebook! :) thank you guys!~ :)
**sasha's message almost made me cried~ haha~
September 04 off to langkawi~will be going to langkawi today ..... haha... finally....
went out for a movie with dawn , eileen n mich.. watched *where got ghost*. the movie was not bad.. a funny one... haha.. it's not even scary at all.....
next week my schedule is kinda packed... haha... monday to fri almost fully booked :)
oh well.... i'm already broke now can u believe it? haha... and it's only beginning of the month~ :)
August 31 :) she looks really lovely.... i was a fan of the little mermaid when i was young :)
anyway... hell training has officially started... 15 rounds is my target...
just gotta endure....
i need to cut down 10 kg!! and i seriously mean it.....
i can't accept myself as a fat woman.... really... i wana look good...
haiz....
i can't wait to leave s'pore.... i'm just so sick of this place.. and i have so many more years to endure~
August 28 1 hr of jogging~ head myself back on track again...
1 hr of jogging is a torture....
did not have a choice... i need to lose 10kg!
i'm really overweight....
i don't want history to repeat...
don't wana be called mount fuji
don't wana be called a hippo etc etc~~~
well.. exams r seriously making me gain so much weight... really...
i hope by... hmm... 2 mths? yea.. i can cut down abt 5 kg? yea... i shall set that target!
will be having a sec class meeting on monday for dinner... well.... well well... haha... hmm... yea i will be going :)
just feel a little bit weird... i hardly talk in class.. seriously....
gonna meet up with bx on tues... dinner on wed with jq ... and i will be packing on thurs for my fri trip to langkawi....
finally.. a getaway ~
heading to china town later with my hmm... bro~... to get some stuff ... i need contact lenses too~~ i want the coloured one :)
maybe violet~
had a good night sleep last night... :) finally~~
alright.. shall update again!~
take care and ... see ya!
muack!~ Fat! well... i'm fat... :(
i need to cut down roughly abt 10kg....
gosh!!~ i'm seriously over weight! August 26 Random entry~ i love pigs.. and always have.... hehe
books r driving me a little crazy at this spot...
what to do~ just gotta endure~
dreams~
one of my dreams~ is to travel all around europe:) is that possible? yea.. if only i have the $$ :) Last one to go~! i shall start studying right after this blog entry...
just had my breakfast.. and i'm currently enjoying my cup of tea... :) i love drinking tea~
it's going to be the last and final exam in my poly life (i pray for that) haha... i seriously hate studying... gosh~
looking forward to my langkawi holidays..... cool... i love going to trips....
this coming friday i shall start jogging.... jogging 20 rounds the track in alternate days... sounds cool huh~
 anyway.... good luck to myself and yup.. shall update soon!~
take care guys~! :D August 25 thinking~
:) i have always wanted to be in love and in a really... passionate relationship when i was a little girl....
as u know.. i come from a girl school.... pri and sec..... it seems like... i have never come in touch with any opposite sex before... haha... well... all thanks to my mummy... throw me to such a lesbian school~
anyway... no one liked me when i was young... i was fat.... short... and.. a little introvert i guess... and i'm never a good talker....
things has changed along the way.... people do grow up right? haha.....
is there really true love out there?
well... i sld really go find out the ans....
yea... i don't wana blog much abt my personal life.. as.. i know.... some irritating ppl are reading my blog from time to time.. that is partly the reason.. why i've stopped blogging for ages~~
maybe i'll get a blog in wordpress soon~ :)
i hate exams~  i had nv liked exams since the day i entered pri sch... ~
my paper seriously sucked..... shitty paper... really...worst paper in my poly life... what rubbish.... just feel super fucked up now...
moderation plz~~~
i'll be going to langkawi nx weekend.... for my 21st bday... :) well.. nth special for me... and... i dun think it's sth to be happy abt.... haiz...
i feel insecure abt my future....
oh well... will not go into that....
hmm... just gonna study hard for thurs final paper... will try my best....
still feel tired after slping for 4 hrs... gosh...
attachments starts on the 28th sept... well... it's A&E department and OT.. and then.... to old ppl ward~~ prcp starts on the 7th dec... which is... orh dei ge 1 nin~ :)
i still gotta endure 2 to 3 more years of my miserable life b4 i could really get what i want.... in life~
side track a little... last sunday mrning.. met up with a person who i have no met for abt 2.5 years... he changed a lot...
was quite disappointed with what he is doing now and his life.. really.. i'm glad that.. we did not get together at the moment of time... thank god.... :) i always knew that god is watching over me and what i do :) he wants the best for me....
school life has ended... acadamicaly.... yup.... just left with clinical placements to complete.... that's fast... time flies... how i wish my 2 years can just fly like that....
yea... it's not easy to live a life .. a miserable life.... but .. i don't have a choice.... i believe.... when the time is up.... things will get much better.... i'm working on it.. :)
i believe that.. i can cope!~
July 21 what a day~fine... today is seriously not my day la.... and yes.. i m finally updating my blog.... as promised.....
soooo many things happened.... really... can't count .. and if i wana say... i seriously have no idea where to start.....
this fri.. will be having theory test... damn... super stress.. the book is as thick as bible... how u want me to read sia....
anyway.. back to today's fucked up thing... the jap girl is super... selfish la... what the fuc*? got photo taking also nv inform ppl.. and she herself dress nice nice.... in the end... addie liting n i went for lunch.. can't be bothered.... what kind of leader is this? no money send sms izzit? no $$ i give u la... wa lao... that's y i always say... *yan dou yan hai hack yan zang ga!!!!!!!!!!!!!* yes i m racist.. so what? fuck them all la.. selfish ass holes....
practiced 2 skills just now in lab.. i m super drained i tell u... super... n i can tell u that i m seriously gonna die.... thanks a lot .. julian n jane... for kinda.. like.. guided me a little... :)
well... finally.. year 3 liao... and it's alr nearing to the last few weeks of sch la... finally.... but as i promised... i will blog abt my frens... each n every one of them what i actually think of them... .. maybe the nx entry :) i m feeling hungry now... need to grab a bite... :)
julian n jane.... u will not be missed out :D June 02 Emoing~well... it's finally.. june.... i can still remember.. what happened in june last year.... :)
memories will always stay.... i dreamt of yi siu last nite.... well.. maybe.. sub consiously.. i still do miss him... :)
i asked him a few questions in the dream... i really wana know the ans very badly.... how i wish.. he will tell me face to face 1 day in the future.....
just kinda wondering.. how's he now... good? in a r/s now??...
i guess.. u have moved on long ago....
i still do drive ard ur area... hoping to bump into u..... but.. i'm not lucky enough... i know.. it's time to let go....
abt 1 more week to ai leen's wedding.. and well.. i'm the bride's maid... haha... just collected my gown this afternoon... and then rush back to class ... haiz....
i'm having very bad cramps today.... stupid menses.... haiz.... my whole face went pale.....
anyway.... i'll be rotting like nobody's business nx week after this fri..... i guess.. i'm gonna do my report writing later on and tomorrow....
Mr D is going to gym with ken tonight.. and as for me.. i just had instant noodles for dinner.... don't feel like going out at all... i'm tired... really tired... mentally and also physically....
met up with shun 2 weeks back... he's doing fine... stable with his girl and all.. glad to hear that from him....
everyone is doing well i guess.. but just me... something is missing in my life.... really..... there's just something missing....
i'm currently... lost.....
is there a map or gps to find myself back??
i feel the emptyness in me... ~
May 13 Insomnia~yea i seriously can't slp at all... also duno y... feeling super terrible... just wasting my time on bed.... haiz.... anyway.. gotta be up early for breakfast~~ no break time for today... from 8 to 12.. dun wana starve myself....
as usual.... having mood swings....
i really duno what's wrong with me..... my mind is just sooo.. messed up...
i seriously love my bed~~~ gosh.. but y can't i just slp?? ahhhhh!!!!!
stress i guess... fri will be the bloody day~~~ May 12 update~just feeling a little uncomfortable..... sometimes.. i wld rather not know some stuff....she stays with him.... almost everyday.... i have no right to be jealous or unhappy.... haiz.... what to do... it was my fault after all...
passed my practical test yesterday and i've got 1 more to go.... on friday....
for this past 1 mth.. lots of things happened... happy and unhappy stuff.... but mostly unhappy.... i've not been smiling and laughing for quite some times..... not as much as b4....
there;s just too many unhappy things happening ard me... confusing stuff... haiz....
anyway... i'll be going back to hk in june... :) finally.... i can take a break.... and relax... i seriously wana thank someone la.... and u know who u r :) giving me a chance to go back where i love and enjoy to be at~~
i think i seriously can't drive manual car la.. i lack so much confidence in it sia... too used to auto cars already.... that's really bad man~~~ :(
bro is on holidays now.... how lucky he is man.... he's at phuket.....
i went there last mth... was really a good place to enjoy... beautiful~~
i shall go slp 1st la
not feeling too well..
i need to loose weight!!!!!! haha~
April 06 well~~yea.... i'm back... finally.. after all these shits~~~~~
too much to update and therefore.... i will just sum up ba....
went bintan with cj... had fun..... did spa for 2 days... hehe... v shiok!~
going to phuket this sat~~~
did quite alright for my exam... and enjoying hard on my holidays....
just recieved a call... regarding.... yi po passed away last mth.... oh well.... was quite sudden... but... yea.... that's life....
i realised that... i feel really jealous when i know more abt ~~~~~ yea... dun feel like blogging.... but yea.... i guess u guys know what i'm talking abt...
haiz..... guess i will be going back to hk in june..... yup.. and also... i will be miss quek's bride's maid.... in june.... think it;s june 14th?? yea.. it's a sunday if i'm not wrong...
erm..... well..... nth much to blog abt also.... my life is boring~~ March 19 just feeling a little... weird and confused~well... nth much here.. just feeling a little depressed here.. yea.. again....
i'm a very selfish person when comes to relationships.... or maybe it's normal? i don't know.... guess i'm just being petty or maybe, childish?? i don't know....
haiz... i dun wana talk at it....
going off for a short trip nx week with my dear chang jin...
and yea.. i'll be going to phuket too.... in april....
fine fine fine... i just dun wana talk abt it...
hell training will be on..... i make sure i will get back my nice figure~ March 11 3 more days~yup.... just another 3 more bloody days and my 5 weeks holidays will begin.....
plans for my holidays will be......
* i need to improve and improve my skills on cooking....
* need to loose more more more weight!! haha.. but in a healthy way of coz....
* save up some $$
* sleep more
* clean up my house~
well.. i can't really think of anything now.. as... my brain stopped working....
i'm sick.... having a very bad sore throat... :(
3 more days of torture..... gosh!~ and i have yet to finish up my guide book~~ fuck~
feeling sleepy.... haiz~
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